No one knows for sure when the first squeegee was used, who invented it, or for what purpose. We can only speculate, but by studying the “facts” we have uncovered a series of events leading to the modern squeegee.

Let us go back to the famous dig of 1927 in what is now Alabama. Two archeologist brothers, one scientist, their staff, several pack mules and one miniature bearded donkey unearth what appears to be a hominid monkey holding a smooth stick with a wooden blade on one end, worn from much use. Baffled by the complex implications, the archeologist brothers turn to the scientist for answers. Unable to provide any help, the scientist quickly turns and runs.

Left with only questions, the archeologist brothers stare for endless hours into their mystical sphere of answers. Suddenly, they hear a voice. They turn in disbelief to see their miniature bearded donkey is actually a talking miniature bearded donkey.

The talking miniature bearded donkey spoke: “Skeeee-ha, Skeeee-ha.”

Thus, the archeologist brothers learned the long history behind the hominid monkey holding a smooth stick with a wooden blade on one end, worn from much use.

Quickly dismissing the truth spoken by the talking miniature bearded donkey, the archeologists decide to burn the remains of the hominid monkey and give the smooth stick with a wooden blade on one end, worn from much use to their aboriginal mother.

Their aboriginal mother, amazed at the sight of her long-lost conjoined sons, is nearly driven to tears when they present her with the smooth stick with a wooden blade on one end, worn from much use. “What is it called?” she asks. Not sure, but quickly remembering the talking miniature bearded donkey’s words, the archeologist brothers reply “It’s a Skeeee-ha.” Having only half a tongue, the aboriginal mother cannot pronounce Skeeee-ha and says “Squeegee? What does it do?” Baffled once again, the archeologist brothers turn and run.

Left with only memories, the aboriginal mother was determined to find a use for the smooth stick with a wooden blade on one end, worn from much use, which she called a squeegee. Her only other worldly possession being an eight foot by twelve foot section of glass, the aboriginal mother wisely decided to use the squeegee to care for the glass as only a mother could.